I’m Sexy And I Know It
When I was still in Canada I would get frustrated with all the “falling in love overseas” and “cute chocolate baby” comments I’d receive from coworkers. After a few follow up messages from home asking if I had fallen in love yet, I have decided to write this post.
Marital Status: Single, chronically single
Scale on the Malawian Man Meter: 9 out of 10
Scale on the Canadian Man Meter: am I invisible?
Proposals received in Africa so far: 4
Most creative proposal: guy selling Fanta through my bus window en route to Mzuzu
Offers for match-making services: 8
Common expressions and sayings:
translation: I think you’re sexy, I want to impregnate you
Hey Mama counts to date: easily over 50
translation: Hey there, how are you, let’s make small talk
Hey Sister counts to date: averaging 3-5/day
translation: I want to sell you something, you look like you have money, please give me money
Madame counts to date: almost always men selling strawberries or people at my window in traffic
Facts, yes facts, on Malawian men:
The guys along the lake: down for a good time and flattery, like most men who work in tourist towns
The guys in the market across from my office: servicing the needs of ‘curious’ white ladies at Koboko hotel
The ‘legend’ of black men: this is true but I’m told it was the men of West Africa who really make it ‘legendary’
Well readers, I hope this has made you laugh. My day-to-day life in Malawi has been quite wonderful and when time permits I enjoying stopping for the “Hey Sisters” and shooting the shit with the locals. I also think it’s cute to flatter the “Hey Mama” shouters with a wave. Don’t worry, still keeping safe!